My wife is funny

My wife, who is very beautiful, is also very funny. I know you already assumed she has a sense of humor since, after all, she did marry me.

But tonight we were eating at Friendly's up in Westlake and she mentioned that my mother-in-law had earlier reported the hometown news that Grove City College is buying the Grove City Diner in Grove City, PA. I immediately lit up.

"That means they're going to..."

"Probably tear it down," she said. "Yeah, there are going to be a lot of homeless cockroaches in Grove City."

That was the money quote! "Hey, did you just make that up?" I said laughing.

She said she had. That was choice. You got to understand how bad the diner was. She used to work there in high school.

I had another friend, Scott, who worked there when he was in high school. He was funny in his own way. He told me about how one owner had posted a sign on the Coke dispenser which read "DON'T MESS WITH THIS G*D D*MN MACHINE". I think he was probably the tenth troglodyte to run the joint. "I don't care if you use profanity sometimes," Scott said, "but don't write it on the Coke machine I have to use!"